Melancholy

I am feeling a bit melancholy today. I am a slave to my checklist. It is nearly the end of summer and none of the "important" things have been checked off my list. In years past, summer has been an incredibly productive time for me. I don't know what has happened the past two summers. I had a large list of things I wanted to "catch up" on for school, some home repairs/rearranging, and some painting projects that needed my attention. Not to mention some serious deep cleaning. During the summer I usually take down and wash all of my curtains, blinds, windows, and artifical plants. So far, I have only done about half. On days like today, I regret putting in all of these windows! However, the largest untouchable on my list has been school. I am stuck. We didn't quite finsh up, wrap up, put away at the end of the year as we normally do. We had an extreme schedule for May/June. Normally a busy time, we added prom, graduation and an extreme testing schedule that lasted until the end of June. All of that left me just pooped. Slowly, I have been cleaning off Emily's shelves. I took down the table in the school room because she was the only one who used it. I am having a hard time figuring out what I want school to look like. I have one who will be beginning 9th grade. Then, I have two that will be 4th & 5th. The span seems increasingly huge. I feel more confident coming into high school this time than I did first time around. But still uncertain with so many details. I know that I am not supposed to have all the answers. I just like it better when I do. :) I have decided that either I am an extreme procrastinator (yes, I know I am) or I really do prefer to just cram at the last minute. I know that at the 11th hour, I will have school ready. So, for now, I am just going to continue to focus on the "want to" of my to do list - extreme cleaning bathrooms, cleaning out closets, under beds, washing linens, etc. All the things that make it easier for me to do/plan school. Twisted, I know. I am sure there is a therapy group out there somewhere... Oh well, until then, closets - here I come!